Hope in the Midst of Hurting Marriages – Part II

By: Karen Polich with Matt & Nicole Dobson

What is destroying marriages today? Self-centeredness.

Chaotic and hurting marriages are not what God designed. His Word calls husbands to an uncompromising commitment to consideration. “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.” (1 Peter 3:7)

This week Pastor Cook began to look at what husbands are called to do in marriage. Husbands, consideration is key. It will give insight and understanding.

4 areas of “consideration” for husbands.
1. Be the spiritual leader. You must be IN God’s Word.
2. Show tenderness. You don’t treat your wife the way you treat others.
3. Intimate Conversation. You honor her like nothing else when you listen.
4. Affection. Value her and show her genuine affection.

Husbands, are you studying your wife? Always learning her ways?

Matt and Nicole Dobson share their insight and perspectives on Pastor Cook’s teaching.

Thoughts of a husband.

Nicole & Matt Dobson

Nicole & Matt Dobson

To have an uncompromising commitment to consideration for my wife, I have to be willing to compromise. I have to be able to see through her eyes. Without compromise there can be no consideration, I will only be focused on myself. Pastor Cook’s visual of the cast iron skillet and the fine china plate really put things in perspective. Strong and sturdy versus fragile. As a husband, I am responsible for keeping myself in check. I have to turn off work and turn on being a husband when I get home. Listening to my wife and not focusing on myself and my day is what I should do. A major effect comes from the choice I make. I really studied the end of 1 Peter 3:7, “so that nothing will hinder your prayers”. How I handle my relationship with my wife affects my relationship with God. I am called to treat my wife as I should so that my prayers will not be hindered. It goes back to being the spiritual leader of our relationship. I have always focused my leadership on teaching and continuing my own learning of God’s Word. I haven’t put my focus as a spiritual leader on praying for my wife and our marriage. Dramatic results will come when I am praying for her and for our marriage daily. It is extremely important. For people thinking about marriage, this information is critical. I believe it is equally important to learn what the bible teaches about divorce. God’s Word is clear on what we should and should not do regarding marriage.

Thoughts of a wife.
I was struck by the thought that if my husband is going to study me like a book or school work, then I need to give him something worth studying. Since the sermon, I read Proverbs 31:10-31 where God’s Word talks about a wife of noble character. It is my job to be that kind of wife. It can be tough to remember that the Bible does not instruct me to fix or change my spouse. It can be my first thought, but it isn’t God’s will. We have many relationships on earth, none more important than the one we have with our spouse. Who we choose as a spouse is the most important decision we will ever make.

Listen to Pastor Michael Cook’s full sermon here and learn more.

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